Providence, Part 3

Ok, this is NOT how I thought God was going to work it out. I was expecting the Ped CT ICU and the Adult Cardiac job offers, and was going to have trouble deciding between the two of them because I want Peds but I don't want ICU. I waited 4 days last week and finally got a call from a recruiter who offered me the Adult Cardiac position, but also a position on a Renal unit. I interviewed for that position 3 weeks ago, and it had closed, so I thought I was rejected. I was not prepared to choose between these two. Whatever job I take has to approve a 2 week leave for a mission trip during orientation. I was hoping this would eliminate an option, but it didn't. Then I emailed the ICU manager and asked if she was still considering me for her position. She said yes. So that means that I have three job offers and I have to decide by...today...which one I want. I have to figure out by today which one God wants me to have. I don't even know which one I want. Everyone suggests different ones for different reasons. I want God's opinion. I thought God was going to give me the ICU position because it scared me so much. Sending me somewhere I don't want to go just seems to be a popular thing for Him to do to me. But now what....?

Providence, Part 2

I had my second interview at UM Mott this Wednesday. When I got onto the unit, the manager warned me that there were a lot of people in the room waiting for me, and a couple were missing, but not to be scared. I still wasn't ready for a panel interview with ten people. I wonder how red my face turned when I entered that room and saw them all sitting around tables waiting for me. After introducing themselves, they started questioning me. The basic, "Tell us a little about yourself." I explained my great interest in pediatrics. It continued to "What interests you about cardio and ICU?" Both my pediatric and my last adult health clinicals were on cardiac units. Then I was honest and told them that I had no experience in an ICU/ER type unit and therefore the ICU scares me, but that I was willing to learn. They asked if I had ever run a code (code blue) on someone and what I thought about doing a code on a child. I answered that I had watched but never had a chance to participate in a code and doing one on a child would be scary at first. Then they shared about scheduling and vacations and orientation. They all laughed and made jokes and it was a really relaxed environment. They seemed happy with me but I'm shy and I have no ICU experience. But God has a way of blinding people's eyes to have His will accomplished.

Then the next day I had an interview at an Adult Cardiac unit at Oakwood Main. First with the manager then two nurses. Two interviews in one. At the end, the manager said something like that I'd be a good fit for their unit. I'm supposed to hear back from both places Monday or Tuesday. I'm praying that if I get a job offer, I only get one. I don't know what I'd choose if I got offered both. I want peds over adult, but I don't want ICU. Am I willing to go to ICU to get my children? I'd then have employment UM. But the adult unit would give a wide variety of experience. Both are more fast paced than what I'm used to. I don't know. God, you know what I can handle and what I need to experience. Please let me know your will and give me strength to follow.

Providence, Part 1

I don't know how this is going to turn out, but I'm going to blog about it now before it goes any further. I've been applying for another nursing job for 3 months now. Getting more specific as time goes. I didn't want ER or ICU or psych or delivery... Then I only wanted full time... I'm still really interested in pediatrics. Those are the only positions I've been applying to at UM. But most of the positions open there are float positions. That means that when I get to work, I could be send to one of a number of different units. I don't have experience enough to work on a different unit each day. I saw this position three weeks ago that caught my eye, but yet deterred me. I was interested but afraid. But I convinced myself to apply. "I don't know why I'm doing this. I have no experience in this type of nursing," was going through my head as I sent off the application. A week later, I got a phone call for an interview that I couldn't quite understand. I heard 'cardiothoracic.' Ok, I applied to some of those positions. Then I heard 'ICU.' Wait, what? And did I hear Pediatric at the beginning of that? Yep, Pediatric Cardiothoracic ICU at UM Mott called me for an interview.

I couldn't say no! If I wasn't interested, why did I apply. So I accepted. As time went on, I felt more relax rather than nervous. The day came and the devil did so much these last few days to try to discourage me, but I knew God was working something. I did my one hour shadow of a nurse caring for a 3 month old post-heart surgery patient. The acuity(sickness) level is so high on this unit that each nurse only gets 1 patient. Then the supervisor called me back to her office and interviewed me. I was honest and told her that the ICU scared me because I have no experience there, but that I'm interested in Peds and cardiovascular and that I learn hands-on, so I will learn ICU. I felt like none of  my answers were properly answering her questions. Have you ever participated in a code (CPR)? No. Have you ever lost a patient? Yes. I don't like the facts behind those questions, but she kept asking, and kept giving me info. Almost an hour later, she continued on to explain the interview process. She then asked if I was interested in the next step: the peer interview. If I don't get a job, it's not going to be because I said no. I'll say yes until God has to say no.

So, starting with an application that I didn't even know why I was sending, for a position I have No experience in, to a 2 hour interview in which I said that the unit scared me, to a request to come back next week for another interview. Really God? How are you getting me to where I don't want to be? First, nursing. Now, ICU! But, as I've been saying for years, If God calls you to it, He'll get you through it. I'm trying to hold on to that. I don't know if I'll get this job offer, or why, but it's obvious that I didn't even get this far without the work of God.